ludwig van beethoven love letters to his beloved immortal

IMMORTAL BELOVED

  July 6, in the morning
My angel, my all, my very self - Only a few words today and at that with pencil (with yours) - Not till tomorrow will my lodgings be definitely determined upon - what a useless waste of time - Why this deep sorrow when necessity speaks - can our love endure except through sacrifices, through not demanding everything from one another; can you change the fact that you are not wholly mine, I not wholly thine - Oh God, look out into the beauties of nature and comfort your heart with that which must be - Love demands everything and that very justly - thus it is to me with you, and to your with me. But you forget so easily that I must live for me and for you; if we were wholly united you would feel the pain of it as little as I - My journey was a fearful one; I did not reach here until 4 o'clock yesterday morning. Lacking horses the post-coach chose another route, but what an awful one; at the stage before the last I was warned not to travel at night; I was made fearful of a forest, but that only made me the more eager - and I was wrong. The coach must needs break down on the wretched road, a bottomless mud road. Without such postilions as I had with me I should have remained stuck in the road. Esterhazy, traveling the usual road here, had the same fate with eight horses that I had with four - Yet I got some pleasure out of it, as I always do when I successfully overcome difficulties - Now a quick change to things internal from things external. We shall surely see each other soon; moreover, today I cannot share with you the thoughts I have had during these last few days touching my own life - If our hearts were always close together, I would have none of these. My heart is full of so many things to say to you - ah - there are moments when I feel that speech amounts to nothing at all - Cheer up - remain my true, my only treasure, my all as I am yours. The gods must send us the rest, what for us must and shall be -
Your faithful LUDWIG.

Grammy-lisious

So as you all know...I’m a secret closet fashion whore.... and I just love love love red carpet fashion, especially the Grammy’s. It’s more exciting and bold; it’s as if musicians are more willing to go the extra mile when it comes to what they wear. Ooo it’s so exciting. Well this year we had the celebs dresses made out of  gold and glitter, to arriving in a incubator/ egg. Some of my personal favourites were Selena Gomez, who is finally dressing her age, although dating the younger Biebs might drag her back into the style of a 5 year old so she doesn’t look like his mommy. I also loved Rihanna;s sheer white Jean Paul Gaultier dress, so so sexy, and totally worth wearing as a wedding dress...if you’re brave enough. My other favorites include, Katy Perry,

But then there were some that would of looked better in there pj’s, like Nicki Minaj, Miley Cyrus (I love these two, just not what they wore) and of course the drag queen herself, Lady Gaga. What was going through her head?! There is nothing left for that woman to do, she Has zero shock value now...the only way she can shock us next is if she comes down the red carpet in a beautiful gown looking human!

Wow I see I’m beginning to sound like granny Barbie’s evil twin Joan Rivers so I’m ending this post...

Feathers and Parties

Ok ok I know it’s been longer than a month since my last post, life has just gotten a bit crazy so here is a quick update of what has been going on recently....

The last few weeks have been especially hard on me emotionally. But yay happiness, amongst all the drama i had a birthday and have hit the horrid 23 mark...I’m getting so old! Hehehe...but despite my old age i still partied the night away...even lost a shoe in the process.  

On a less happy note, I’ve been trying to deal with the death of my grandfather, and even though it’s been 4 years, it’s still hard for me to think that his gone, he was my everything. A better father, a best friend and a man that would love me no matter what. So after years of deliberating I had finally settled on the best way to remember him, is by getting a feather tattoo. Whoever doesn’t cry through a foot tattoo...you are either on drugs or not human!!!! It was one of the worst feelings of pain I have ever been through!!!! But I got it and now I will always have him with me.

And for all of you who are going through a hard and unhappy time...keep your head held high and your chin up, there is always a rainbow at the end of the storm

Dirty little secrets

(This is not my secret)

Everyone has dirty little secrets, these people are just braver than I am. I promise by the end of this month I'll tell you one of mine...

http://thesecretpostcards.tumblr.com/page/24

Out with the old, in with the new.

At last a new year has arrived! Now I’m not saying the last year was a bad one, it was just  a year of very high highs and very low lows. Some of my most memorable moments where the 2010 soccer celebration, new friends, new tattoos as well as new found independence. Some of the lows were seeing a lot of my friends go through hard time, loosing friends and disappointing my father.

 But Yaaay it’s a new year! This is going to be year of change, hard work and intense creativity projects. I have set myself so many goals, some to challenge myself and some that just need to be done (drivers license department here I come!!!)

So all in all I am very excited for this year and to see what it has in store for me…

You know you’re a Hatfield regular when:

·         you refer to Drop Zone as “Mordor” or “Droppas”.

·         you greet at least half the bar men / bar ladies working in Drop Zone / Herr Gunters / OppiSquare / Cheeky Monkey / Aandklas.

·         you know exactly what a Chicken Surprise is at Vetkoek Maleis.

·         you know who everyone is talking about when they refer to “the cigar lady”.

·         you don’t find spontaneous table dancing at Aandklas strange or odd.

·         you know the ingredients and taste of a Pan Galactic Goggle Blaster / Cheeky Ice Tea at Cheeky Monkey out of the back of your mind.

·         you know where someone wants to go when they refer to the “Afternoon Cocktail special”.

·         you know what the terms “Oom Wors” and “Tannie Wors” refers to.

·         you know exactly what “Lets Go Upstairs” means when you are in Hatfield.

·         you order brandy & coke at the bar referring to it as “A brandy special”.

·         you laugh at people from Johannesburg / Cape Town / Durban who are claiming to be experts on pub crawling.

·         you give your liver a pep talk before a huge rugby match / concert.

·         you’ve been to multiple TUKS FM New Years Eve parties.

·         you know what a “jam jar” is.

Ho Ho Ho

I know its been almost a month since my last post! Shocking and terrible i know, but lack of money means lack of Internet! Excuses excuses!

Well I'd like blame the jolly round man up in the north pole! Thanks to him and his silly reindeer, i have to spoil my loved ones, now I m not complaining! Shopping and pleasing people are two of my greatest pleasures!

But while buying the cutes ceramic cupcake surrounded by red, green and gold decorationsi couldn't help but think of the true meaning of Christmas. Its not all about seeing who can give (or receive) the most expensive gift, its not about the giant meal that keeps you fat well into the next year. Its about family, Love and most importantly its the most important birthday ever.

So while you wolfing down your Christmas mince pies with your family, stop and thank them for everything they did for you this year.

And from me... thanks for reading and have a merry merry Christmas (i know its a lil early!)

Night Shades...

Yuck yuck yuck!!! What do people think when they walk out the door, and put their sun glasses on...AT NIGHT!!!! This is one of my greatest pet peeve ever! Whenever I see some one with what i like to call the douche blockers, it makes my skin crawl! Do these people really think they look good? Like when they all fist pumping in a club, do they go up to a member of the opposite sex get them to come home with them... can you imagine their shock waking up to the person under the glasses! I imagine they sleep with them on too! sigh...

Here is a example of what the night eyed douche looks like...be warned ladies, there is a reason is aways wearing his over sized glasses!

Yummies in no time!

Choc - Cup - Cake

Ok so I have these horrible and very fattening cravings for chocolate cake ALL the time! So I found this quick recipe for cake in a mug! Sooo coolies! And so yummy! Best thing when you alone at home with a ridiculous chick flick!

Things you’ll Need:

• 1 Coffee Mug
• 4 Tablespoons flour
• 4 Tablespoons sugar
• 2 Tablespoons baking cocoa
• 1 Egg
• 3-4 Tablespoons milk
• 3 Tablespoons oil
• 3 Tablespoons Chocolate chips (optional)
• Small splash of vanilla

 - Get a coffee mug of choice. If you are making this as a gift choose a coffee mug especially for that person. If you are making it simply to eat just grab your favorite coffee mug. 

 - Add dry ingredients to coffee mug and mix well.

 - Add the egg and mix thoroughly.

 - Pour in the milk and oil and mix well. 

 - Add chocolate chips and vanilla and mix again.

 - Put your coffee mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts. The cake will rise over the top of the mug, don't be alarmed.

 - Allow to cool a little, tip out onto plate if desired and eat.

"Where beauty eats braaains"

It’s that time of year again! When everyone tries to think of the grossest, most outrageous outfit and if you are of the fairer kind, you will be looking for the skankiest outfit! Now just like my LBD drama (see previous posts) I have no clue what to wear or what to go as!

Since I was a little girl, I loved running around playing dress up! At 22 I still do! Every Halloween I come up with a billion ideas for the next year! It’s so hard for me to just settle on one idea! And I always have my final idea a couple hours before the party, and once I get there I wish I went as something else!

Well this year I’ve been zombie brain washed so I made my mind up that I will be a zombie something, the last few weeks I’ve been researching all kind of zombie stuffs…and I found this awesome website, go check it out http://www.myzombiepinup.com

So with 4 days to go to the party I have finally settled on a zombie bride, yeah, yeah I know it’s been done before, but it’s perfect! It mixes the beauty and innocence of a bride with man-eating blood thirsty zombies! Ooo sounds yummy…

So wish me luck! And I hope you all have a haunting happy time!

To Bianca

This is a poem given to me by my nearest and most beautiful friend, Bianca, on my 21^st, and I would like to return the favor. It has become one of my favorite poems and has so much meaning to me…

Nowever – E.E. Cummings

I carry your heart with me; I carry it in my heart.

I am never without it.

Anywhere I go, you go my dear

And whatever is done by only me is your doing.

I fear no fate, for you are my fate my sweet.

I want no world, for beautiful you are my world.

You are whatever a sun will always sing as you.

Here is the deepest secret nobody knows –

The root of the root and bud of the bud,

The sky of the sky of the sky of a tree called life

Higher than the soul can hope, or the mind can hide,

And this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart; I carry it in my heart

Real vampires dont sparkle!

“…..Lets hide the bodies under the bridge…” – Slug of Atmosphere

Bloody, dangerous, mysterious, sexual deviants, gods of the underworld, slippery, sly, conniving, hungry, immortal, faithless, carefree and damn right crazy.  These are the words that in my opinion describe a true vampire not words like, sparkly, day-walking, loving, animal eating ect

The vampire culture has taken over the worlds youth. But instead of using vampires like the ones seen in blade, From Dusk to Dawn and even Buffy the vampire slayer.  We have been exposed to Edward Cullen! The gayest vampire, for heaven’s sake he even sparkles! The youth of today have been “glamoured or compelled” into loving the greatest myth of the underworld, but not knowing the truth.

I will admit I enjoy the series, true blood and even vampire diaries. I love the romance and forbidden love of Vampire Diaries and that vampires are an almost accepted race in True Blood. And even though the writers twisted the facts they were still more realistic than Stephanie Meyer, the writer of twilight, who not only allows her vampires to walk in the middle of the day but she lets them sparkle within direct sunlight, (yes I have an issue with the sparkles)

It breaks my heart that vampires have been dolled up and “cutie-fied”. They are psychotic man eating, blood sucking creatures with no feelings of love or regret. Who fry in the sun, can’t live on animal blood, which are repelled by crucifixes, garlic and holy water. I sometimes fantasize that the grossest most unattractive vampires tear up the world, and destroy every teenage idea of vampires and then  saving only me and making me their queen.

“It leaned to one side. Its skin was fresh and flushed. The nails were evilly long , sharp and pointed. The mouth crooked and grinning, slobbered with blood from its last night of rampage. A stake was driven through its wicked heart and a terrible screech uttered, as the vampire gushed and squirted gallons of warm blood. It burst into flames and moments later, all that remained were the ashes of count Dracula, the vile vampire”

That’ll be the day

A few nights ago I had the pleasure of watching the South African produced buddy holly show at the state theatre, Pretoria. The Being the wannabe aristocrat that I am, I was so excited and it was also an excuse to dress up! Show directed by Pierre van Pletzen and with a cast of Andrew Webster and Craig Urbani, it really exceeded all my expectations! It was fun, made me want to dance and it was in my opinion flawless reenactment on the life of buddy holly.

I remember laying in my grandparent’s lounge listening to a buddy holly record sharing my purple Smarties with my grandpa. And after listening to the show and remembering every song I couldn’t help but think about today’s societies “music”

All you hear on the radio now days is auto-tuned lazy artists who are more concerned with their “look” than their music. This really upsets me. And I’m no music genius, but I know that music isn’t what it used to be, the greats like Buddy Holly, Elvis Presley, Bob Dylan, Kurt Cobain, ect, who fought and pushed their way to the top. These were the true artists, and were known for their music and not for wearing meat dresses, flicking their 16 year old hair trying to swoon women and gyrating their 52 year old asses on stage. And if it’s not terrible pop songs, badly written rap tracks and disappointing rock tunes its terrible loud overboard rave (which in my opinion should have stayed dead in the 90’s.) I say we give all of these so called “artists” back and have the greats returned in their place.

"That’ll be the day

Well, that'll be the day, when you say goodbye
Yes, that'll be the day, when you make me cry
You say you're gonna leave, you know it's a lie
'Cause that'll be the day when I die"

Anti - Biotix

Ok so like every dedicated girlfriend I think my boyfriends band is amazing, but his bands not like any other band out there. And i know what you thinking, I just think they good because I'm the girlfriend, but its not that, i heard Anti - Biotix when they were still  Arkhum Insane Asylum, befor i dated "Harliac Arrest".

So what makes them so different to any other rap crew out there? They fall under a genre called Horror-core, which puts them in the same legue as rappers such as Necro (yuck), Vast aire, Boondox and I.C.P. So what is horrorcore? Its the craziest insanest grosses things you can think of put in a song. Although Anti falls in this catagoty, they are no where near as vile as necro (thank god!)

The band consists of 3 talented guys, Darren, Jarred and Peace who have been freind for so long thier periods are in sync :) Check out their Facebook profile http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Anti-Biotix-SA-HIP-HOPHorrorcore-Rap-Crew/138743249505075

Yum Yum Cupcake Recipe # 1

Chocolate Cupcakes with Chocolate Ganache and Cream Filling
CUPCAKES
1 cup flour
1/2 cup unsw. cocoa
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup butter
1 cup sugar
1 tsp vanilla
1 egg
3/4 cup milk
Mix flour, cocoa, baking powder, soda, and salt. In a separate bowl, cream butter and sugar on medium until light and fluffy. Reduce speed to low and add vanilla and egg. Add milk and flour mixture alternately while still mixing.  Pour into lined cupcake pan. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes, or until toothpick comes out almost clean.
FROSTING
3/4 cup chocolate chips
1/4 cup heavy cream
Melt chocolate and cream in metal bowl set in simmering water.  When smooth, spread on top of cupcakes.
FILLING
1 stick room temp. butter
2 1/2 cups confectioner’s sugar
1/4 cup milk
1/2 tsp vanilla
a dash of almond extract
-> Beat butter until smooth. Add sugar, milk, vanilla, and almond. Beat until spreadable.  Use a knife to cut a cone-shape from the top of the cupcake. Trim the bottom, fill hole with cream, and cover with remainder.

LBD dilemma

If you are anything like me, you like to plan your outfits for weekends and parties way in advanced. And if you anything like me you are on a serious budget!

A few weeks ago i got an invite to a casino themed evening at a Friends house, the invite said that its absolutely crucial we dress in our best cocktail dresses and suits. This immediately caused me to panic! I dont own any cute cocktail dresses and i really cant afford to make one! So i have decided to pull out my Little Black Dress , shake the dust off and find some cute accessories and heels to wear. Problem solved!

So i went google crazy to find some helpful little tips to make me look absolutely fabulous...

Jewelry is always your safest and easiest accessory. If you want a very sophisticated look, simple necklace and earrings are the way to go, but if you like me, the bigger, the chunkier and the louder the jewelry the better! But don't over do it! If you have chunky bangles, keep the earrings small. If you want to wear 3 or more necklaces make sure you only have one big bangle... Its all about balance ladies (and gents if you into that kinda thing)

If you have a short skimpy dress, make sure you wearing some va-va-voom statement shoes, if you want to be on the safe side, black is always a good idea, or you could wear the craziest wildest heels, but then keep the other accessories to a minimum. A clutch bag that is a same colour as your shoes could always come in handy for your lip gloss or phone.

If its going to be a cold eve, a flowwy patterned scarf or a blazer jacket are always a fun walmer, or if you really lucky you can weasle your way into that special someones arms.

So i hope those silly tips helped you out! Now to learn play poker...Hmmmm...

This is me and this is my blog

Wooo at last i have my own blog! hahaha i blame movies for making blogging look so glamourous, its such a mission getting it started! But its totally worth it! This isnt going to be one of those how to blog, or one with insanely amount of intelligent information, its all about things that interest me and make me happy! Things like art news, fashion, bands,body art, crazy nights out, scandoulous secrets (see pic below) and fabulous cupcake recipies! Hope you all enjoy it!

this is me!!!